"Air goes in and out, blood goes round and round, any variation on this is a bad thing." -House

Monday, November 12, 2007

Can we add a few hours to the day?

On second thought...that would suck, unless they're sleep-hours. I'm still kicking. Mostly. My "treatment" for sleep difficulties has increased my depression (because God knows, it would be BAD for something that works so well to have no side effects). I love sleep meds because they take all the stress out of bedtime. But they put mucho stress into the rest of the day. Not of the good, lemme tell you. Muscle tension that makes me feel like my neck muscles are squeezing off the blood supply to my head is my symptom of the month. I'm trying very very hard to not "make war" on it and hate it like the hateful little bugger that it is. Trying VERY hard. Not succeeding. I absolutely hate these symptoms. I hate the psychological effect they have on me, I hate the feeling of weakness and hopelessness. I hate feeling like this is never going to change. And I REALLY hate feeling sorry for myself. But it's there, in big neon pink lettering in my head. Did I mention I hate neon pink?